So, it was my goal to spend one year in "adjustment" mode, settling in as a new mommy. I usually somewhat overextend myself, much to my liking, keeping myself extremely busy, mentally & intellectually stimulated, and overly stressed. My roster usually includes my teaching, an artistic endeavor and some entrepreneurial undertaking. For example, last year this time I was teaching four classes (University of Houston Downtown and Houston Community College Stafford); co-producing the annual fundraiser for Texas Southern University, the TSU Honors (honoring 58-year veteran head coach of the debate team, Dr. Thomas Freeman and award-winning gospel vocalist and radio personality, Yolanda Adams); co-starring in a short film, I Pledge Allegiance (written and directed by Lionell Hilliard); and rehearsing for the role of "Ruby" in August Wilson's, Seven Guitars at The Ensemble Theatre. During all of that, I found out I was pregnant, quite unexpectedly and much to my dismay. Even now, I have absolutely no idea how I made it through that time. If there was ever a time in my life that I would not want to revisit, that is it. Miraculously God got me through it. Nonetheless, that was a workload which represented what my life was all about; a true reflection of how I moved about at any given moment.
Suffice it to say, there is no way I could function at even a fraction of that capacity now, having Jace as my sidekick. I have been typing on this post for about an hour and fifteen minutes. Jace has awakened every 10-12 minutes, sometimes for feeding and others just to be rocked back to sleep. Seemingly he is having a difficult night, yet this is a typical night in the life of Jace's mom. With this being my reality, it would be practically impossible to take on any responsibilities that require consistent and concentrated focus for periods of time, with people depending on me. So for right now, the only things on my agenda for the remainder of the year are my classes (two for now at the University of Houston Downtown) and co-producing the TSU Honors 2011. Although the "Honors" is not until April 2011, we have already begun planning and putting feet to the event, which is so dynamic it will take all of the eight months ahead to plan.
I knew I wanted the role in Jitney although I knew it would be a stretch, not knowing how I will manage with Jace, as I go through the four weeks of six-day-a-week rehearsals, followed by four weeks of performing six-shows-a-week. But that did not change the fact that I wanted that role. So, I auditioned. And, I got it. I will just have to work out the new-mommy-management on the back end. For now, I am excited that a very important piece of my life has made its way back into my reality. Acting is my passion and theatre fuels my spirit. To know that this role is waiting for me gives me something tremendously wonderful to look forward to. I am anxious to see how all that I have been through over the last year impacts my acting sensibilities. Naturally, having a child now, I feel more serious. I feel more committed. I feel more present. Those are things I know will serve me as an actress. So we will see what lies ahead for "Rena."
It is said that art imitates life. Interestingly, the last two roles I played were ones where I was pregnant (I Pledge Allegiance and Seven Guitars) and I happened to be pregnant in real life (that means that Jace has already made appearances on both stage and film ;-). In the role in Jitney I play a mother of a two-year-old trying to stabilize her young family as she navigates motherhood along with her future goals. How ironic. Well, not really...just art imitating life again.
Thank you, God, for not forgetting how important this part of my life is to me. This is truly a gift.
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